Thursday, June 9, 2011

I'm a soul man.

Today is the 9th day of the month of June.  Today, about 29 years ago my mom and dad gav me a gift.  I did not want this gift, I am pretty sure I requested that
A) it be in the color green
B) It would not crap.
C) It would always do what I told it to do.

It did none of these things.  It cried and pooped it was not green and it did not listen!! (come to find out it had hearing problems..oops)  It's name was Nicole, and it was a pain in my ass!  It got all the attention and it bit.
  I had to deal with this "gift " every day.  I wanted it to go back to the planet that it emerged from.  The planet of not green babies.
As the years dragged on I had to deal with her on a day to day basis.  I am pretty sure that it was not until the year 2000 that I actually admitted to myself just how much I loved my "gift".

Then it finally went away.

So, as I have learned, when you finally let your heart open up and let things in..they go away.  Sad but true.
Not really.

My sister is pretty OK.  She got all the looks in the family, and she got all the bum.  I have no bum.  God took it away from me before I was born so he could save it all up for my sister.  Thanks.

My sister is pretty strong, I think she learned that from me.  No, not really, she is just strong on her own, I am not too sure if she knows it though.  Maybe it is a secret that only I can see.

My sister is pretty smart, she would have to be, she works at a bank, hell, if I worked there people would freakin love it because I can't count..when I see numbers all I really see is %^$#..ride bikes??

My sister is a good wife and mom.  I like her kids, they are well behaved and they look just like me.  Well, when I have a tan.

There are a lot of good things about her, I can't write them all because you would get bored.  I can't bore my readers.

I don't like that she lives far away.  I do like that I can say "Hell yes I would babysit if I lived closer" Even when I am telling a fib.  Which is never because I do not lie.
I guess what I am saying is..I am lucky.  I am so thankful I got stuck with her.
However, I do feel really bad that even though I am older..I look much younger than her.  Sorry Nik.


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  2. you are such a good, sweet, woman. For every bit of blessed you feel to have Nicole as your sis...I'm certain she is equally happy to have you. And, were wrong about one thing...she's green after all - then, she was 'green' because she was new & always new to things that were familiar to, she works in a 'green' (money) place. all just a matter of perspective, lol.

  3. Hahah. You are hilarious. I am sure your sis loves that you look much younger. I would say it's your youthful spirit keeping it that way! :)

  4. You're hilarious and a fantastic big sister. :)